Congrats to Neil Black

I was really pleased to see that Neil Black became the British Athletics team performance director recently. Neil is a great motivator and hands-on operator (literally in his case being the team’s physio for many years) and is someone I have a great respect for.

I remember when I was struggling with injuries throughout the 1990s and became quite depressed and unable to feel positive about anything. I saw every quack under the sun, from acupunturists to Zen Budhists, but to no avail. A GP friend, Peter Greenaway, who had just begun to specialise in sports medicine, put me in touch with Neil as a last throw of the dice. Neil immediately highlighted several muscular-skeleto problems and set about a course of treatment that enabled me to not only begin training again but also gain the bronze medal in the Zest Peugeot National Fitness Championships in 2000, aged 45.

I’ve learned a lot during my time in sport and one of the things is to beware of fads, BS merchants, psychologists and anyone who tries to reinvent the wheel. Saying that, science plays a major part in the sporting arena nowadays and Neil is in the same mould as Dave Brailsford as someone who will leave no stone unturned to give Team GB that vital edge in competition.

Now all we need to do is sort out our football team!

Jimmy Savile

I’ve been doing my very best to resist the urge to blog of late as book commitments leave me little time for distractions, however, the Jimmy Savile controversy has prompted me to vent my spleen.

Obviously I do not know all the ins and outs of every claim, indeed of any of the claims, but it is quite obvious that at best Mr Savile was an odd, rather sad character whose behaviour towards the opposite sex was inappropriate (at worst of course he should have been outed and locked up away from society many years ago).

Only a few short weeks ago I was out cycling with a chap who had bought Jimmy Savile’s bike and we were exchanging stories about his legendary charity fund-raising (only my dear departed friend Jeremy Beadle even comes close to the amounts raised by Mr Savile). A visit to his grave to pay respects was planned…

So what do we feel about the man now?

Well there is no grave to speak of anymore and the press have vilified the man to the extent that his family feel threatened by the adverse publicity. The same family who were so proud of him that they denied the case of the woman who came forward as his illegitimate daughter - perhaps that woman is now thankful for the rebuttal.

But, and please do not misunderstand my words, I cannot help but think that every person who kept quiet, be it an individual or corporation, and who now says they knew of his lascivious nature, are almost equally to blame for any wrongdoings.

I just don’t understand why a blind eye could be turned in the same way as I do not understand the reasons why my own Catholic church ever covered for debauched priests. Of course I do not include the alleged victims in my judgement as I can quite understand circumstances where silence is the only viable option for the young and vulnerable but we cannot condone the silence of so-called responsible adults.

How often have I bleated on about the dangers of nepotism and all its many guises in our every day dealings in life? This is yet another. A powerful man perceived to be an eccentric do-gooder is forgiven his many sins as he lays claim to a soft spot in the hearts of the nation. Let’s be honest. We all knew he was odd and he didn’t hide the fact that he could be dangerous – once admitting on a talk show that he could make a phone call in London and someone up north could have their legs broken! But because of Jim’ll Fix It and his charity marathons we chose to believe that his inappropriate looking fondling of young girls was entirely innocent. I for one fell for it - and who can blame me? My mind would tell me that this man was a surly, difficult reprobate but the BBC elevated him to a level that made him untouchable. I ended up liking the man despite his obvious shortcomings - but then again I had no idea that there were greater demons in his psyche.

And how can it possibly happen that a man walks the earth for 84 years and is one step short of sainthood but then dies and subsequently stands accused of the most heinous crimes?

Does it surprise or shock me?

Not in the least.

I have often said that human beings are a naturally scurrilous lot both in word and deed. We turn a blind eye to “loveable rogues”, we favour friends and family even when they are wrong, we even throw out all sense of decency on a Saturday afternoon when we support our football teams by daemonising the opposition. And yes, I have done these things myself so claim no moral high ground. Our politicians are less corrupt than in many other countries so we settle for the mediocrity. Is it just my age or are today’s politicians a joke? Perhaps they always have been – maybe the joke is on us. Having dabbled in local politics I can honestly say that the greasy pole to the top might be paved with good intentions but in stark reality is a slimy dirty business not befitting of decent right-minded folk and inhabited by misfits, wannabes and reprobates. A sweeping hyperbole of course and a slur on all those individuals who take up public duty for the right reasons BUT unfortunately even those people become part of the system eventually compromising their maverick good natures in a self-deluding haze of expediency - or else they simply fade away as shrinking violets. It is these people as much as the police, the BBC or showbusiness insiders who I blame for making society the dishonest disenfranchised mess that it is. Until we nurture politicians who do not throw us crumbs just before an election but who passionately care about the ongoing state of the nation irrespective of election results, we will always struggle. We will always tolerate the Jimmy Saviles of this world. Just look at the inappropriate honours bestowed upon businessmen such as Sir Philip Green, Sir Richard Branson and Lord Alan Sugar. Not wishing to belittle their achievements but hardly known for their intellect, megalomanic tendencies, vested interests in all manner of areas and yet because they scratch the back of certain political parties from time to time they have power that is detrimental to an enlightened society. I will shout it from the hilltops but no one needs more than a million pounds even today and all these people should be taxed accordingly and the money used to float third world equality. Let us not revere the rich and famous per se but instead admire their deeds.

Only then will people speak up and ensure that the little man is heard and just maybe a fair society will ensure that no child in care will ever again be abused – better still a fair society will ensure that we no longer have children in care

The A to Z of British (and Irish) Popular Culture

When I decided to have a crack at publishing my latest book myself rather than through an established publishing house I had no idea of the many and various pitfalls I would come up against. I obviously took advice from friends in the industry who had also taken the plunge and indeed met with my erstwhile publishers Tim Whiting and Alan Samson at Little Brown and Orion respectively. That said, some of the things that frustrate you cannot be catered for, and in my case the biggest obstacle was to find a printer that could actually deal with books of the magnitude of the A to Z series. And I am not arrogant enough to mean the importance of my books when I use the term magnitude I literally mean the actual size of the book!

Various well-intentioned printers attempted mock-ups of the A to Z of almost Everything but alas none of them could produce a finished article that would hold the binding of the book. Try as they may by reducing font size and page display all attempts failed so I decided to try CPI Clowes, the printer that produced the 5^th edition of my best-selling book. Clowes offered me a competitive quote and are now handling both the physical book and also the E-book. Mine will be one of the few quality books available thus far as an E-book. That is not to disparage the existing electronic reference market but the truth is the established so called quality popular reference books such as mine have not been reproduced as it is felt it would eat into their physical market too much. This might be so but my way of thinking is that it is great for the reading public to have a choice and I know full well that some people buy my books because they look good on the shelf, other readers are diehard fans of the physical book, some staunch quizplayers will no doubt purchase both formats (at least I hope they will). But even if the E-market supersedes the physical, so what, surely the reader demand should be catered for and not segregated against. As a former accountant I understand the need to discriminate the sales markets but not the need to discriminate against the buying public!

I’m very excited at the prospect of negotiating with retailers and libraries as I haven’t a clue if anyone will want to buy the book in without the backing of an established publishing house. And of course the marketing of my books has always been done very efficiently by Little Brown, the sales team placing it in all sorts of unusual markets, the best of which was undoubtedly Readers Digest, who sold almost 10,000 on their very first ad and it became their best-ever selling book. And then there is the promotion of the book, the home team have always packed me off to the BBC for a week of half-hour slots on BBC Radio stations around the UK and Ireland. Will I have the same facility on my own? It is all uncertain and even today when I thought the book was in the can and all I now need to do was to set up some sort of payment system on my dedicated website for advance sales I overlooked the small question of ISBN numbers. I had assumed the printer would sort this one out but was horrified to find out that it was down to me! The usual method is to purchase an ISBN via a UK agent and the process takes about 10 days which would have meant I was struggling to get the book out before my intended target of the middle of June (as I have a short holiday planned with a Christian group in Studland, close to where my father lives). I might still struggle as other unforeseen circumstances arise but fortunately a quick phone call to Little Brown seems to have solved this particular problem as they have promised to send me a few numbers before the end of the day which is jolly decent of them considering I am not publishing the book with them.

One of the prime reasons why I have not sought out a publisher for this work and do not intend to for future works (although once I have failed miserably I will undoubtedly bash down the doors of all and sundry with tail firmly planted betwixt my legs) is to keep the costs down and thereby sell my books a little cheaper than at present. Of course I cannot dictate to any retailer and now my books have been increased to £30 it might be difficult to persuade them to lower the price but that is the idea, and I will certainly offer retailers the product as close to cost as possible in my quest to contain the price. Advance sales should be £20 as long as there aren’t too many to cope with and I’ll do my utmost to keep as close to this price has humanly possible, at least for the forthcoming pop culture book and the Sports book which was originally planned to be published via Orion but if all is well I shall now publish myself too.

And what does The A to Z of British (and Irish) Popular Culture actually contain you might ask? Well here is a brief synopsis of what is between the covers. There is a promo video floating around somewhere on Facebook or Youtube (Not sure about the website) but in a nutshell

Television and Radio

In-depth details of more than 2,000 TV and Radio shows

Including comprehensive cast lists past and present

Biographies of well-known presenters

And all the various reality show winners

Cinema

In-depth details of more than 2,000 films stretching back to the days of silent movies

Including comprehensive cast lists and plot synopsis

Biographies of more than 1,000 film stars

Plus all the famous British institutions, Bond, Potter, Doctor, Confessions

What a Carry On!

Pop Music

In-depth chart history of hundreds of bands and solo artists

Including dates and chart positions of singles and albums

Biographies of pop stars past and present

Plus every UK Top 10 listing since the dawn of the charts

Comedy

In-depth coverage of stage, screen and radio comedy

Including Music Hall, Double Acts, Ventriloquists and Stand-ups

Biographies of hundreds of comedians past and present

Plus catchphrases, routines, novelty records and films

Miscellaneous Section

In-depth coverage of those quirky British Institutions

Including Beauty Pageants, Celebrity Mums…..and Dads, Pipesmokers and Rears of the year

Biographies of hundreds of models, presenters, soap, reality and sports stars

Plus Comics and Cartoon Strips

And for the ladies – Magazines!

And for the gents – Classic Cars and Motorbikes

I hope you like it

Why didn't they pick me for England?

Although I am 58 in a few minutes and clearly a stone, or two, overweight since my recent cycling accident I am heartened to know that I am still good enough to play cricket for England!

This revelation might appear optimistic, surprising and even downright delusional, particularly as, although not a bad player in the day, I was never even close to international honours.

So from whence does this apparent hubris stem?

Why do I feel I could have done a legitimate job for England yesterday and certainly feel I could have equalled the contribution made by the likes of Messrs Bairstow, Prior, Bresnan or Anderson, both with bat and ball.

 After all England are currently the best Test team in the world and I am well past my sell-by date, have a dodgy right knee, painful left Achilles, and frozen shoulder to boot.

Ok, as you probably may have expected by now there is a pretext for my flight of fancy and it simply tickled me that the England team went out to field yesterday morning for one ball before mopping up the West Indies innings and then batted the day out for the loss of three wickets. This means that despite both batting and fielding on the same day not all the team contributed to the team effort.  I wonder when this last happened, if ever. Is there another sport where this could possibly happen? Gabriel was caught by Swann off Broad and only Strauss, Cook, Trott, Pietersen and Bell had a bat. This means Messrs Bairstow, Prior, Bresnan and Anderson could have stayed in bed all day.

This is quite different from one of those days when two batsmen have dominated proceedings. England actually batted and fielded!  How could you explain this wonderful game to someone not versed in its vagaries. Can you imagine the conversation at home with the Priors.

"Hi dear, how did you get on today"?

"Not bad love, my pads were a little tight and I think one of my under-gloves needs changing as I swear that's why I perpetrated that errant throw yesterday"

"Yes yes darling but how did you play? You know as wicket-keeper you are such an integral part of the team I'm always worried that you'll overdo it"

"No no sweetheart a relatively easy day for me today considering we batted and bowled"

"So will you require your usual massage"?

"Too tired darling, the life of a professional cricketer is a tough one you know; just ask KP he'll tell you"

The God (p) Article

From the time of man’s first disobedience humans have been striving to understand, develop and improve their environment and living standards. Even before Jesus walked this earth man had begun to experiment with photography and who could argue that the developments witnessed since the 19^th century have not aided humankind in many areas, perhaps most notably in xray imaging and its digital offshoots.

We now know almost everything we need to know about our universe and computer technology is such that the world of computerised virtual reality is heading towards computerised actual reality where touch and smell are added to programs.

My dear friend David Levy has put forward a powerfully reasoned thesis in his book Love + Sex with Robots where he  postulates that humans will soon be having relationships with aesthetically fashioned machines cutting out all the baggage that goes with human interactions. Again, who could argue that within this world which is biased towards the ‘cool’ and beautiful, a large proportion of us wouldn't opt for unconditional love. Would a machine that could actually talk our language be any less beguiling than a pet animal?

The latest development to excite the world of science as a direct result of photography is the possibility of the Higgs boson hypothesis becoming proven. The so-called ‘God Particle’, which is perhaps aptly named as man seeks to become all-knowing,  is being investigated with the help of the Large Hadron Collider (the world's largest and highest-energy particle accelerator) which lies in a tunnel 27 kilometres (17 miles) in circumference and as deep as 175 metres (574 ft) beneath the Franco-Swiss border near Geneva, Switzerland. The LHC is expected to address some of the most fundamental questions of physics, advancing the understanding of the deepest laws of nature. The possibilities are endless.

As a Christian I am wary. In Genesis: 11 the Bible tells us of man’s self-indulgence and arrogance in deciding to build a tower up to Heaven. God in His infinite wisdom, knew this "stairway to heaven" would only lead the people away from Him. He noted the powerful force within their unity of purpose. As a result, He confused their language, causing them to speak in different tongues so they could not understand each other. By doing this, God thwarted their plans. He also scattered the people of the city all over the face of the earth.

To me there is a fine line between using technology to alleviate misery and suffering within the wonderful gift of freewill granted us, and using technology to interfere with nature and all its beauty. We often gauge the price we are paying for some of our advancements in terms of carbon footprinting but hardly ever consider the deeper aspects of our meddling. We as humans have a very cavalier approach to science and some academic institutes are undoubtedly only concerned in making a name for themselves; and its individuals in winning laureates.

In the wide spectrum of life, taking all things into consideration, are any of these technological advancements a boon to society? It is not for me to comment. The question is a complex one and the answer almost unfathomable. As we prolong our lives quite artificially, and increasingly against the previously accepted ‘laws’ of nature, can we honestly say this is a good thing? After all, one of the promises that God made to us is that we would have eternal life if we kept the faith. This has always been one of the most appealing aspects of Christianity, however the life we are promised is one that is so good that it is unimaginable to us, especially from the viewpoint we have as lucid individuals.

We cannot replicate God’s promise. The economic laws we learn at a rudimentary level tell us that sometimes we have to be thrifty in order to safeguard our future. You might know the story of Joseph and how he budgeted for the seven years of famine and built up stocks so the effect was neglible in Egypt. This is the classic model of prevention of boom and bust that the world is experiencing so painfully right now. When we defy these laws of nature we pay a price that cannot always be quantified. Let’s be honest, it is doom and gloom wherever you go nowadays. Eastenders is almost light relief these days!

I am of course being facetious but all I am trying to say is that to my mind there are far better ways to use our scant resources than on the LHC in search of the God Particle.

If the world’s monetary resources were spread more evenly then there would be more joy in the world. Humans would still strive to better themselves in order to better others. Sloth would be prevented by a new ethos of love and understanding of others.

We have all experienced momentary selflessness whether it be a charitable donation, unconditional love of a child or unpremeditated heroic gesture. When this becomes the accepted norm instead of a situation where we elevate perpetrators then we know that we are moving in the right direction.

As human beings immersed in original sin we can only reach this idyllic state with God's help. All those people who say "I am a good person and do not sin" think about those nasty thoughts they experienced the next time someone cuts them up in their car. Think about the time they lost their temper last, perhaps irrationally. Think about the time they did not give their brother or sister the benefit of the doubt and chose to be indifferent. 

We all sin and our sin becomes acceptable to us over time unless we are reigned in like children.

God is our father, we the naughty children that need growing up. Many of us never grow up.

My day in court

Today I attended Horsham Magistrate’s Court for contravening a red traffic light and it was a very emotional and costly experience.


Of course I knew I didn’t stand a chance of having my plea of innocence upheld as the integrity of the Gatso Cameras have to be maintained by the magistrates - and I certainly couldn’t prove the camera was faulty.

As it happened the numerous hours I had spent compiling four DVDs of the troublesome traffic lights meant precious little as the court did not bother to look at them as the legal expert did not feel it would prove the camera was not working properly – my only real defence.

On the 4th May I was driving through Three Bridges at 1.52pm and passed through an amber light on one of those systems with another set of complimentary lights on the other side of the junction. Unfortunately as I passed through the first set the complimentary set then changed to red so I was stuck in the middle of a busy junction and had to drive on through that red light.

I was served a summons two weeks later although didn’t understand initially that I was being accused of driving through the first light three seconds after it had become red.

I remember very well going through the first light on amber and I remember very well it changing to red a car’s length after I passed it as I could plainly see the complimentary set change before my eyes.

On filming the lights I noticed that four seconds after these lights went red traffic invariably came out of the junction road (St Mary’s Drive) but in my case there was not another car to be seen on the junction. This doesn’t of course prove I am innocent but the second picture they sent me had me in the middle of the junction four seconds after the light had changed to red so the clues are there that something was not normal.

Apart from the fact that you would have to be stupid to go through a red light on a very busy road junction three seconds after it was red my memory of the incident is very clear and unequivocal. Of course it is possible that I had an aberration of some sort, after all a member of my family once accused me of swearing at them and yet my recollection was that I couldn’t have done as I simply don’t swear and never have. As the years have gone by I have often questioned the truth of the incident and this episode has brought it to the fore once again.

I can assure you that if I were wrong about the traffic light it would not be a question of me lying to save some money, God forbid I would have saved in the region of £500 by not going to court on a fool’s errand. No, as a Christian I would never lie under oath, and in fact I found myself being so truthful that when asked whether I had seen the flash of the camera I replied “No, but then again when I got caught three times on the same day on a speed camera outside my home in 2001, I did not see any of the flashes then either”.

I think the magistrates believed I was earnest, if not deluded, but the truth is can our memories of things be trusted. My memory is very good and yet I am the most absent-minded person on earth so is it possible that my memory of the incident was built after the fact and I did indeed travel through a set of lights on red totally oblivious to what I was doing.?

The truth is otherwise in my mind. It was a vivid memory at the time and when I parked my car two minutes later in Pound Hill I thought about the incident and I remember hoping that I made the light without penalty as I was acutely aware that it was a close shave.

No, I feel one hundred per cent certain the events happened exactly as I remember and yet how could my car be in a picture that shows a digital representation of the camera information depicting ‘03’ meaning I had crossed the light three seconds after it became red!!

Answers please on a postcard to confused of Bewbush

We are Family!

Lately I have felt like I have entered a world somewhere between The Twilight Zone and The Outer Limits and I have just been waiting for normal service to be resumed as soon as possible.


This year has been surreal ; awful in many respects.

The past few months have given me time for reflection and there has been a lot to reflect on as I seem not to be coping with my ‘accident’ as well as I thought I was.

Perhaps it is the niggling pains, the thought of being indisposed for months, the sleeplessness or just the sense of loss at feeling unable to ever again take part in my long-time sport of cycle racing – who knows?

I have some fantastic friends and I know it is a cliché but without them I don’t know how I would have coped at all. I have been up and down, feeling I’m going to die one moment and then feeling strong the next. When I’m in a car I find myself terrified of traffic and any threat or fear, however slight, is causing my body to flood with adrenalin, causing breathlessness and dizziness. One Friday evening recently, a short walk to the end of the road turned into a fight for survival as my heart began to thud out of control forcing me to drop to my knees tearing clumps of grass in confusion. I understand now how my dear sister was terrified of traffic after being involved in a serious car accident in August 1966.

I have felt such a wuss of late and at one point my closest friend actually begged me to ‘man up’. I believe these episodes are panic attacks and can be brought on by the anxiety of chronic illness. It still doesn’t sit well with me though as I feel my faith should be enough to prevent any feelings of anxiety. One of my favourite biblical passages is in Matthew 6 where we are told that we cannot add a single hour to our lives by worrying. It is evidently true and yet in moments of crisis we let ourselves fall into the devil’s trap of self awareness and pity. One of the injuries I sustained in August was a hole in my left ear. This has caused me to develop a constant high-pitched noise which I tend to negate by leaving the television on at night to give myself some background noise. I turn the TV off at some point during the night and immediately become aware of the noise and what I began to do was to believe it was all doom and gloom instead of thinking it was just a temporary blip that will pass – all things inevitably do. I have now put all negative thoughts out of my mind since I’ve been back to church and able to read my bible again.

As I say, my friends have been great. I’ve been overwhelmed with lifts and gifts, including my erstwhile bête noire of an Amazon Kindle. God forbid, these infernal machines, that have been responsible for seriously depleting my hard copy sale, are actually quite useful when one only has one good hand.

As always when I suffer stress or grief my mind turns to family. Who actually are my family?

I have five siblings who for one reason or another are estranged to me. I have never really come to terms with it, as unrequited love is never pleasant and within a family circle it is confusing and frustrating and creates great sadness. I know I am to blame for much of it although I don’t really see it as a blame issue at all. We had a quite unusual upbringing and amid our laughter and joy was some sadness. This sadness was rarely spoken about but in our own individual minds I know it was there. We became islands and did not let each other in too much for the simple reason we knew of each other’s trials and tribulations and our way of dealing with it all was to escape into our own worlds.

I have however found great relief within the scriptures.

Jesus teaches us that family is our Christian fellowship group - with God at the head of the family.

I know I have had lots of people praying for me lately and this has given me enormous strength.

My own faith too, although peppered with moments of self-indulgence and anger at why I should be in this present predicament, has also fortified my vulnerable natural state. I can make some sense of it all above the randomness of earthly misfortunes, in fact it is the Christian way to look within ourselves at times of crises and to put our houses in order if needs be. Sometimes we reason that God has been trying to tell us something and we have refused to listen. Please don’t misunderstand that I am suggesting that God punishes us for being stubborn although in my darkest moments I’d be lying if I said the thought never crossed my mind. No, my natural self tells me that I am so flawed and insignificant that God would never be bothered with the likes of me, but my Christian beliefs help me understand that we are all significant to God so some rationalisation is required.

In my case my life does need tweaking. I have lived selfishly as a sportsman for so many years and even through illness and injury and a doctor’s warning not to cycle any more I have persevered. Sometimes I wonder if it defines me as a person. I gave up quizzing partly because I felt the time allocation was too great and yet I spend hours down the gym and hours more out on my bike.

I have also struggled with gambling and celibacy over the years, the former I used to accommodate by promising God I would never gamble during the forty days of Lent and the latter I would reason was a natural inclination to share one’s life in holy matrimony.

So who do I consider to be my family?

Of course my blood ties are unbreakable and I live in hope of reconciliation. I actually knocked on the door of my dear brother Gary only the other day and although I prayed beforehand that I might say the right things unfortunately he wasn’t at home so I didn’t get the chance to say anything at all. I think he knows I love him though so all is well.

Can people you don’t see be family?

Yes they can. Jesus teaches us that our family are all those people that share the same vision, the same hope and the same faith. When His mother and brothers came to visit Him once He made a point of remarking, while pointing to all His followers, that these are my family. My closest Christian friend is as much family as any of my blood relatives but also all those Christians I might not know the name of are equally considered to be family.

Don’t we all feel supportive of fellow members of clubs and societies?

I pray that my blood relatives are Christian or at least will one day be so. Quite often the state of Christianity is a mere timing difference!